“Is this real life? Yes, Chris… SOBcon is real life…”

After SOBcon, a three day social media/business/blogging mastermind convention in Chicago. I feel like the David After Dentist kid, it’s hard to step back into reality after three days of being surrounded by some of the most caring, innovative and successful people in the business. Here’s how SOBcon changed my life and the five things that you can do to change your life.

1. Surround Yourself With Positive People

Do what you love in the service of people who love what you do” -Steve Farber

When I came home, I felt like I just took a bath in awesomesauce. Three days of people helping each other out, great compliments on my work (serious blushing action) and amazing advice from people that I look up to in the industry (turns out many of them are fans of my work!). When I first started in blogging I was in a completely opposite situation, not much support from my old friends and constantly surrounded in a world of negativity and backstabbing. What I have found at SOBcon is real, honest and supportive people that I have only known previously behind a computer screen. Shockingly, what I found is more support in the last three days than the fake friends I had in my life for years. As Lewis Howes said in his panel at SOBcon “I’ve lost a lot of friends…” it’s true, sometimes when you start kicking ass in life the last thing you want is people that are holding you back or always raining on your parade. As my friend Barry Moltz says “Sometimes you need to get unstuck”, SOBcon was just the thing I needed to get unstuck from my past life… Get rid of those debbie downers, surround yourself with people who inspire you.

Here’s a video on “How Miss Destructo Gets Unstuck” from Barry Moltz at Sobcon 2010

2. Learn from others

Talk about light bulbs, this was a power plant. Not only during our mastermind sessions were the ideas flying, but the best ideas came up over dinner or a few drinks. When people relax and start telling you their stories, I found out that almost everyone in that room started out somewhere small many people also came from the whole ramen noodle lifestyle. They told me their stories of success and failure, as I sat there and listened I saw the passion in their words escape them like beams of light reaching to grab the deepest parts of my soul. You can’t buy this kind of inspiration at the store. One thing that I learned is that everyone that is there, never gave up. If they did, they wouldn’t be there. I can’t even imagine back in my days of eating nothing but yams and sardines that I would have such an opportunity to learn one-on-one with the people that inspired me back in those days to keep going. That means you Mr. Chris Brogan… Thank you for believing in me, because of that.. I kept going.

3. Help Change Someone Else’s Life

“Make everyone happy for 5 Minutes a Day” -Scott Porad CEO of ICanHazCheeseburger.

I believe that everyone has the potential in them to change the world and their own lives in ways that they could never imagine. People always laugh because I strike up conversations with random people when I travel and find how they can change their lives using social media, just like I did. No matter if you are a taxi cab driver or a CEO, you can become the most wanted in your field by simply “having a little fun with whatever you are doing”and using the tools of social media to create an empire. For example I met this taxi driver in Chicago, nice young guy but he lost his construction job after moving from Ireland, he hates being a taxi driver “I fooking hate this job”… okay, really hates being a taxi driver. So I told him, he should start a twitter called “The Angry Irish Cabbie” could you only imagine if he started tweeting about his everyday job, making something interesting out of it. He may become a local personality and who knows where that could lead him. Go out there and use your skills to help other people change their lives.

4. Rock it.

Whatever you are doing right now, rock it. Put all your passion in the right place and don’t forget to have fun with life. Look at Lady Gaga, what she is  doing is a job. It took many years, but she worked hard, made herself stand out of the crowd and put all her passion into getting where she is. She’s a very busy woman yet still takes the time out to thank her devoted fans. Be a rockstar at what you are doing, but never get too big for your own britches and always remember where you came from. Ego is nothing if no one likes you. Always thank your fans and people that support you. BE REAL. BE TRANSPARENT.

At SOBcon Karaoke… everyone is a rockstar.

5.  Take More Risks

“Do it if it scares you”- Nathan Fillion

Not many people know this but few weeks before SOBcon, I almost didn’t go. I was taking care of my father and the household, I was also scared that I wouldn’t feel like I would belong among the greatest minds in my industry. On the flight to Chicago, I was still very nervous because I had no idea what to expect. I turned to my in-flight magazine to find Destructo Deviant Nathan Fillion’s smiling face and his interview about how he took risks and where it has led him… “Do it if it scares you”, I knew right then and there that this trip could change my life. I was no longer scared, I was ready to take to the streets of Chicago, which I did. The first day I went out exploring by myself, I got a little lost but found my way into the hearts of 150 new people at SOBcon at the end of the Magnificent Mile. Take risks, explore and if you get a little lost.. find your friends.

Photos from SOBcon

Miss Destructo’s Photos- http://www.flickr.com/photos/missdestructo/sets/72157623961774500/

Speakeasy Party- http://www.flickr.com/photos/adrants/sets/72157623846286487/

Sat Night Karaoke- http://www.flickr.com/photos/adrants/sets/72157623853766863/

SOBcon Day 1- http://www.flickr.com/photos/adrants/sets/72157623970544642/

SOBcon Day 2-  http://www.flickr.com/photos/adrants/sets/72157623978021094/

Thank you to my personal superheroes Scott Stratten, Barry Moltz, Liz Strauss and Terry Starbucker for making SOBcon possible!

Is this forever? Yes, I hope it is…


13 thoughts on “Destructo After SOBcon: 5 Ways To Change Your Life”

  1. it was nice to briefly meet you at the SMC Chicago party (before SOBcon).

    I must agree with this post. I am not a "feel good" person, it just feel super unnatural to me. When I started blogging regularly (I've been blogging on/off since the late 90s but not seriously until '05) & then getting more heavily involved with the whole craziness of the Social Media community, I felt weird about the feel-good-fest.

    I am still not 100% comfortable with all the positive energy, sometimes it feels artificial and self serving to me but I do my best to expose myself in the appropriate dose for me and when it is around me, I try to take it all in.

    I don't give out idle compliments so I don't appreciate when they're given to me. When someone produces something incredible, I will be the first one to tell them. But sometimes, you just need a boost and a pat on the back for doing what you do everyday and the SM community is great for that. It really keeps you going!

    Thanks for the post…great to meet you!

  2. Love. This. Amen.

    Meeting you and spending time with you this past weekend was a highlight for me. I will be watching as you 'take more risks' and 'rock it' – I have all the faith in the world that there are amazing things in your future. Will be fun to watch!

  3. Love this and even sitting on my bed with my laptop most of the weekend. I did feel the love in the room, the encouragement and support.

  4. One: you are a fearless Glamazon! I was so glad we had a chance to share a table for one of the days of the conference. There's such a great energy present when people allow themselves to be fearless, and the support at SOBCon will launch a lot of folks into some great spaces this year and beyond.

    You are amazing. Thanks for being the force of nature that you are. :)

    Best, M.

  5. Post is great except for the glory-hound in the video…….

    You were everything and more I thought you'd be when we met in person. Pure awesome

  6. Glad I have the opportunity to surround myself with positive people like yourself right here in our home town – Tampa Bay – oh and for those who haven't met you irl yet….Meet Miss Destructo :)http://cate.tv/video/miss-destructo-crosses-our-p

    You rock it on a daily basis dear and I'm proud to have you as my friend :) Everyone, keep your eyes on her…..@missdestructo :)

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